Personality profiles tell me that I am more task-focused than people-focused. I must admit that it is true. I love, love, love people. But I also like my calendar, check boxes, and to-do lists. There is freedom in knowing the next thing to do. But there is also a trap: Neglecting relationship for the sake of the task is all too easy.
Our culture is busy. That is no surprise. A busy culture feeds my drive to accomplish and starves my desire to connect with people. When I constantly need to accomplish a task to keep up with the schedule, I can overlook the people I’m doing it all for anyway.
The vision my husband and I have for our family cannot be contained in a list of check boxes.
I want to savor time with my family, to relish the beauty of our simple daily moments, to look my husband and children in the eyes and really connect. Instead, I hear myself saying things like: “In a minute”, “Just a sec”, “I need to do one more thing”.
I want to be intentional in parenting, education, activities, and ministry, because I believe I have a God-given calling to bless people. Yet, we often end up running from one place to another without margin in our time to consider why we are doing it all.
I want to break the statistics of teenagers not communicating with their parents. But if I constantly refuse the opportunities to talk with my young children, I am going to default to being that statistic.
What about you?
Is your family running crazy busy?
Does our culture overwhelm you to keep up?
Do you want to be intentional but default to our culture’s busyness?
Are you pressured to perform and please others’ expectations?
Do you want to savor the daily moments of life together?
God’s Design for Families
When God designed the family, He gave us a gift: A group of people who can learn and enjoy life together. A safe place to make mistakes yet receive grace to get back up. If only we would allow God’s Word to permeate our homes so we can be that safe place.
“These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
Looking at this verse, I see many slow verbs.
Talk. Sit. Walk. Lie down. Rise up.
If we are going to teach God’s Word to our children, we need conversations.
In order to have conversations, we need to slow down.
The words just before the instruction to teach God’s Word to our children give another instruction: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” Deuteronomy 6:5 (NASB)
We have a command to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, and might. To love with focus like that, we must be intentional.
An intentional focus to connect with our families is starved by lack of margin. We must fight to have the space for conversations.
Do you desire to slow enough to intentionally connect with your family?
Join me in cultivating an atmosphere of rest in our families. It doesn’t mean we have to stop everything we enjoy doing. We can build some tools to foster rest and conversations along the way.
Upcoming Topics Include:
- The Power of Questions (drawing out what we already know)
- Tea Time (creating times to stop and simply be together)
- Margin (practical tips to build margin into a busy lifestyle)
- Sabbath (the blessing of intentional times of rest)
- 5 Common Topics (an ancient tool for modern conversations)
We can pursue a restful, intentional lifestyle with our families by implementing simple, restful strategies. Rather than be distracted by the tasks in front of us, we can focus on the people in our lives.
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